WIHTH #6 (Brace yourself for a downer)

WIHTH #6: This time of year has me drowning in sad memories.

This time last year:

First there was this pathetic glimmer of hope.

Then crushing disappointment and buckets of self pity. (not my finest moment in blogging)

Then to top things off, a week later, the powers that be kicked me while I was down and took away even more. (so forgive me god, God, Allah, Buddah . . . if “this little light of mine” don’t shine so bright right now.)

And then there is non-IF holiday pain:

Less than a week before Christmas about* 1 decade ago my husbands mother died much too young, unexpectedly and tragically

On the very day of Dec. 25, almost* 2 decades ago my Opa, my closest grandparent, died.

So it’s not all about picture perfect lit Christmas trees and stockings hung with care. It’s about loving those around you and grieving those who aren’t. Both those who actually lived and died and those who simply never came to be.

This WIHTH is not uproariously funny and if you came here for my usual sarcastic wit, I appologize. But this is the real WIHTH. I know I am too consumed with the losses right now to focus on the blessings. The blessings do exist. I’m just not sure how Thankful I can be one week from today. Maybe it’s enough to just be present and save the thanks for next year.

*I know each of these dates, and even the hours, by heart. I am choosing to be vague here for my own sake.

WIHTH Reason #4

Why I Hate the Holidays:
Reason #4:

These festively depressing reminders of what the holidays SHOULD include arrive in the mail almost daily

WIHTH

WIHTH = Why I Hate The Holidays* (lately)**

Reason#1 The Holidays are all about kids. I don’t have kids (yet).

Reason#2 The Christian Holiday AKA Christmas celebrates the BIRTH of a BABY to a VIRGIN no less (!!!) And I am kind of mad at G-O-D anyway.

Reason#3 Holiday merchandise (greeting cards, decorations, etc.) is finding its way into stores well before Halloween. This is ridiculous and uses up what little festive cheer I might manage to summon up well before we even reach Thanksgiving. When you’re this short on holiday cheer, you need to save it for when it counts. Being bombarded by the commercial merchandising blitz does NOT help.

*This may become an ongoing series
**I used to enjoy the holidays as much as the next person and hope to again some day soon

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As requested by Mel/The Towncrier.