Do you have shoes to match this bag?

After another trip to the RE’s office I now have a stay in catheter and a leg bag. Lovely. It does NOT match any of my shoes. Hideous. Peeing red, but somewhat lighter. I got to see the blood clot on the ultrasound. I had my first abdominal ultrasound at the RE’s (be careful what you wish for . . . or at least be more specific. I wanted to see a BABY on ultrasound, not a f*ing blood clot in my bladder)! The clot came from the bladder hole(s). It is now wreaking havoc with my state of mind, not to mention my body.

Sigh . . . this just sucks so bad I don’t even know what else to say about it.

I better get a “take home” baby out of this, because I am NOT doing this again.

Please everyone send off a prayer, light a candle, or whatever else you think might work.

I am really hoping that:

a) that this is all worthwhile and I have an awful story to tell my future awful teenager(s) about how s/he/they came to be.

b) that this stupid clot does not buy me a visit to the urologist, but instead clears up on it’s own SOON. Very soon. Like, by tomorrow at 1:30 pm when I see the RE again.

I’m off to bed now, though honestly I don’t expect to sleep much. This damn bag is a mini and my bladder/kidneys have been VERY busy. (Translation: this damn thing fills up in less than an hour.)

Damn, damn, shit, fuck!

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20 Responses to “Do you have shoes to match this bag?”

  1. DD Says:

    Oh I know you can cuss better than that. Such a lady you are.

    Have you told your doctor that this puncturing of the bladder is just unheard of in the blogging world? He (she?) will take you seriously then.

    I only hope you can get some rest in spite of the bag pulling you out of bed once it fills up.

  2. sube Says:

    I just read through your last three posts. I cannot believe what you’ve been through – completely above and beyond. Hope you’re feeling better.

  3. N Says:

    What the fuck!!!! Like Sube I just now got to read your last three posts – the ordeal? Poor thing you! What’s that with puncturing the bladder…..no no no that can’t be normal!

    Poor thing you! But like you say the whole story will be worthwile to go through if you can use it for your future teenager to tell when he/she misbehaves…..my mom always tells me that she almost died when I was born and gives me some really bad concious with that…it helps 😀

    I really really hope that you are better tomorrow and that you get rid of the catheter…..how awful and that your fertilization report is wonderful!

    Hugs,

    Nina

  4. Thalia Says:

    I’m looking forward to helping you craft that story for your awful teenagers. Hang in there.

  5. Meg Says:

    ARHG, Beagle! What an awful couple of days you’ve had!! I hope everything clears up ok. Cathetar must be such an unpleasant experience. Hugs to you. xx

  6. Lindy Says:

    Oh dear God, Beagle! That is just ridiculous. I can’t believe you’re having to deal with this on top of everything else. Completely awful. I’m just so sorry sweetie and I hope it resolves by this afternoon.

  7. Just another Jenny Says:

    OMG Beagle, I am so sorry. That is awful. I cannot believe this ordeal. I’m saying fuckfuckidityfuckfuck for you. Man, that is such bullshit. I know after my ER I said I would never do another fresh cycle but the pain memory fades quickly. I am not comparing though, I went though pain but not what you are dealing with.
    Damn right you better get a take home baby! I’ll be thinking of you.

  8. MoMo Says:

    Oh Beagle…how awful and frustrating. I am so sorry you have to go thru this and as dd said this is unheard of! I hope you feel better for your appointment tomorrow. Thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers! Hugs!

  9. Anonymous Says:

    I still cannot believe what they did to your bladder! That is so not what you bargained for! And a leave in catheter?! I’m sending anti-infection, pro-baby thoughts your way. Hang in there! —mm

  10. Pamplemousse Says:

    Oh Beagle, I am so sorry that you have had to endure this! I have to say that I had the most uneventful retrievals in terms of pain and suffering and I never knew how lucky I was (both times). Take care of you and you can still shop for matching shoes on the internet, right?

  11. Sarah Says:

    Wow, can’t believe that you have to go through this on top of everything else! Hope that things clear up quickly. Great fodder for a story when you need to guilt out the kids though! I’m thinking of you today and hope that you are feeling better.

  12. Chee Chee Says:

    Now that just sucks the big one! I have never even heard of this. I am totally hoping that this cycle works for you and that the blood clot is behind you with no need for further medical intervention.

    Take care.

  13. Anonymous Says:

    Ugh- this is awful. I think this is right up there with OHSS as being on e of the worst complications of IVF. I’ve never heard of puncturing the bladder to get at the eggs. That better be the egg that fertilizes and becomes your baby, after all this. Hope you feel better soon.

  14. Ornery Says:

    Oh Beagle, I’m so sorry that you’ve had to endure so much hell! Your teenage kid had better kiss the ground you walk on when you tell him/her/them this story!

    Thinking of you, and hoping that your bladder heals quickly and that your transfer is far less eventful than the retrieval!

  15. Sunny Jenny Says:

    What the Blazes! Seriously! Never heard of a pierced bladder…OUCH! I really feel like a sissy for complaining about my er now! The things we IVFers go through! How goes the fert. report?

  16. pixi Says:

    Sorry, Beagle, it sounds miserable. I hope things resolve very quickly.

  17. soralis Says:

    Oh my I am just catching up… I am so sorry about retreival that is horrible!

    Take care and wishing you the best!!!!!!!

  18. Donna Says:

    OMG, I am cringing and wincing in my chair just reading about this. I hope you got some decent drugs at least.

  19. Claudia Says:

    Sheesh, what a mess! I’m so sorry you have to deal with the bladder issues on top of an already stressful IVF cycle. No fair, no fair at all.

    Hang in there and keep us posted. Fingers crossed that the rest of the cycle goes smoothly.

  20. seattlegal Says:

    I just can’t believe all that you are going through!!! I’m sending prayers that everything will be o.k. very soon!

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