Archive for February, 2007

Life *should* not be a struggle

February 16, 2007

I’m going to start writing “Dear Opr@h” letters. (Letters of complaint, that is.)



February 13, 2007

What is everyone getting their sweetie for V-day??

I have no idea beyond the card I bought. And next week is our anniversary! Help!

New Digs

February 12, 2007

Come on over!

Cats in the Cradle* is now in a functional state of being and I plan to mainly post there from this point on. I’ll keep this site up and running, and I’ll post any earth shattering news here, but for the day to day, please come on over!

*Blogger’s version of password protected does not require a password at all, it just requires an invite. The down side is that you need a google account of some sort to sign in (gmail, new blogger or the like) and the other downside is that it does not put out a feed, so the new site won’t show up on Bloglines, etc. To make up for this I’ll put out an e-mail notice of new posts.

I’ve sent out invites to all who asked. Several have not responded. If you’ve changed your mind, that’s OK, but if you wanted to follow along and the invite got lost in cyberspace just let me know, I’m not trying to exclude anyone. (All I need is your e-mail address. I would prefer that if you are a regular reader, but I don’t know you, (AKA a friendly lurker), please let me know your blog address as well.) My e-mail address is beagleblogger at gmail dot com.

So there we have it: project privacy is now complete. I know some of you believe that privacy is not the point of blogging and maybe you’re right, but I also know that several of you have been burned by the public aspect of this forum. Having considered both sides of the issue, I feel strongly that going private is the best choice for me.

Keeping busy in the meantime

February 8, 2007

I have been reading your posts, but not keeping up as well as I normally would. I am trying to read as much as I can on the topic of adoption, specifically domestic/open adoption. I’m overwhelming myself a bit but it’s also giving me something to focus on other than failed fertility and a delayed cycle.

I just read Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother by Jana Wolff. This was a very interesting read. It’s not all touchy feel-y happy but it’s in no way anti-adoption either, it just addresses things our PC culture is not willing to say out loud. It’s one woman’s very real, very candid, account of what her experience has been. And through it all it is very clear that she loves her son.

I am now reading A Love Like No Other by Pamela Kruger and Jill Smolowe
This one is a collection of essays on the topic of adoption, representing many different points of view, types of adoption, etc.

And in bits and pieces I am alternating between these three:

*The Ultimate Insider’s Guide to Adoption: Everything You Need to Know About Domestic and International Adoption by Elizabeth Swire Falker

*The Unofficial Guide to Adopting a Child by Andrea DellaVecchio

*Reaching Out: The Guide to Writing a Terrific Dear Birthmother Letter by Nelson Handel

For fun/book club I am listening to The Other Boleyn Girl on my mp3Player.

As an aside: I just treated myself to an iPod after my cycle failed. I have yet to master that device. I got really frustrated with it because I mainly wanted to use it to listen to audio books. Well, I can buy them from audible dot com or the like but the free ones I can download from my library are not iPod compatible, only mp3 compatible. (The aforementioned frustration came from the fact that nowhere was this incompatibility spelled out). So I also bought a $40 mp3 player which kind of has me wondering why I need the $250 iPod anyway, other than to be one of the cool kids!

I’ve never really been one of the cool kids.

In other news I am starting something new next week. I will be volunteering at a preschool one morning a week. I will need to juggle my actual work schedule around this but hey, I have lot’s of practice with that!

One of the things that hit me like a ton of bricks, while filling out our adoption application, is this: we have no non-relative kids in our life. No friends with small kids, no kid contact at all. Partly this is due to our age (many of our friends with kids are sending them off to college now) and partly this is due to infertility. We have most definitely gravitated towards other kid free people in the past four years. I felt like a bit of a misfit when I realized I couldn’t really name a reference that was a non-relative and has seen us interact with kids!

Now volunteering at a preschool won’t give me a reference (not since I want to mail my application asap!) But it just triggered some thoughts about how I can fill that kid gap in my life until I have my own. Not because I need a reference but because I need an infusion of joy in my life. Kids bring with them a certain kind of joy. That carefree approach to life that is all play all the time.

(Now I know those of you who have kids are rolling your eyes! Hey, think about it: I will only see these kids four hours a week. Chances are they’ll save their tantrums for Mommy and Daddy at home!) This may seem like a crazy idea, but I’m going with it for the moment. I’m thinking of it as the adoption version of prenatal classes. Yesterday was to be my first day, but due to a snow delay we will try again next week.